My Symphony

I have been trying to figure out why I feel so restless. Everyday it is a struggle to feel as though I'm living my life with purpose. I have small moments when I find myself smiling or when I take a deep breath and feel the oxygen completely filling my lungs. This moment, although lasting only a second, reminds me of how I used to be and how I want to be again.

I can't explain to anyone let alone myself why I am unhappy. I have many reasons that on default I provide people who ask: "I really want a job, I want to be in a relationship, I want to lose weight, I want to have an adventure...." And the list goes on and on and on. But is there one specific issue, or am I so extremely swamped with uncertainty and want in my life that I have finally given up? Now I don't mean I am giving up on life but maybe the I'm letting the possibility of me being happy slip through the cracks. I have been trying to find a way to explain to myself and others this issue I am facing. What am I feeling? What am I scared of ? What is it that I really want in life to make me happy? Do I even know anymore what I want? I have been feeling so restless that I just throw out ideas like leaving the country, moving to Texas, moving to Bellingham, or just trying to make it as a musician. Finally I am deciding to slow myself down and make some choices. One step at a time. I cannot be irrational with my life. I am a logical thinker and planner, I have always been this way and I always will be.

So the song that has spoken to me through this process is, "Symphony" by Marie Digby. You can find it at www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xa-cSOFv_nQ If I had to say in words all of my thoughts and fears that are contributing to my restless and useless feelings I have had this song would be the perfect fit. Please listen to this song. You might find comfort and inspiration through its lyrics. Whenever I blast this in my car, I feel motivated to finally make something amazing happen for me. I went to a memorial service this weekend and found myself wondering what people would say about me once I die. I want them to list the amazing accomplishments and adventures I have had. In order to make this happen, I have to write my own symphony and I can promise this, it is going to be a show stopper.

Today's challenge...start writing your own symphony and make it beautiful!!!

Make a Wave

I just heard a song today that sends the perfect message of doing your part to make a change in the world. There are so many people with talents that remain dormant because they don't know how to use them properly or they are too scared or lazy to shake the world up a bit. Well this world needs a good shake in the right direction. We all need to try to find our strength or talent and share it with the world. God made us all unique and blessed us with gifts that were meant to be shared. We were not given life to sit around and waste away, only to die and leave behind nothing for future generations. We are supposed to leave a mark on this earth somehow. I know I have said this over and over but I truly believe deep in my heart that we all have something to offer this world, it just takes some work figuring out what it is.

So here is a little inspiration for you... Check out, "Make a Wave" on youtube by Demi Lovato and Joe Jonas. I really think this song can lead us on the right track. www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DmuCFopmWY

Humanity???

I have a new song for you today! "One day," by Matisyahu. I don't think I need to analyze this song but I want to explain why I chose this song. I have spent most of my blogs trying to inspire you to do something positive and meaningful with your life, but there is another type of inspiration that I have not touched on yet.

My favorite word is "Hope." There are so many reasons to hope and ways to hope. But in my eyes, all of the the people hoping have something in common. We are all hoping for something better. Whether it is to fall in love, or to get a job, or ace a test, this hope is what holds us together through the toughest of times. Hope is sometimes the only thing we can grasp on to with the last ounce of strenght we have left. We hold on so tightly to this hope becuase we need to believe that things will get better for us. Hope gives us something to live for when we fear there might not be anything left.

I think that this song will give our future as a world some hope, which I think many of you will agree we could use right now. Sometimes I find myself doubting humanity any more. We are surrounded by hate and violence and I wonder will there ever be peace??? Are some people even capable of love and tolerance? This song puts into words my fears for our population and also what I hope and pray will eventually happen! I am sure that a lot of you find yourself hoping for that one moment when we stop the violence and embrace everyone for who they are. When people stop seeing violence as a way to get their point across. When people no longer have evil in their eyes and when people use intellengce and words to find peacful and fair solutions to the most difficult problems. Who knows if it will ever happen but I would rather spend the rest of my life hoping for peace then giving up on humanity!!!

Start Swimming

I just heard a new quote that really made me think. "If your ship hasn't come in, swim out to it." This quote speaks specifically to every issue I have been facing. Lately I have not been liking the person I am becoming. I am now officially the person that sits around and complains that I don't have a job and that I wish my opportunity would finally come. I find myself wishing every night that what I have been wanting to do would finally happen. That my break was in the very near distance. I am acting like I deserve this amazing future and I will just sit around being depressed until it happens.

The other day I read this quote and it made me take a long look in the mirror and question what I am doing with my life. Am I really the type of person that is going to sit back and wish for something good to happen? No not anymore. If I want something to happen then I need to get my butt in to gear and make it happen. Nothing positive happens to people that sit back and wait for their fortune to appear.

So today my challenge for you....Get off your lazy butt and make something happen. Quit wishing for your chance to come and work hard to make your future exactly what you deserve!!